
While at forty weeks my baby was yet to come, I became agitated and anxious at the same time. To say I was beginning to see signs of labor even made the matter worse. Painfully, my husband does not seem to grasp what is going on inside of me. When he notices me squeezing my face, he apologizes and walks on. I recall seeing him sleep blissfully one night when I couldn’t sleep. Really? I awoke one morning angry with myself, my spouse, the unborn kid, and God. I reasoned that if the baby knew she wasn’t ready to come, why should she give me signs that she was? I made up my mind at that point that she should be on her own while I also remain on my own. In fact, I wrote a note to my husband, a few friends, and family members. It reads, “…since na help I dey help una carry una baby, abeg tell una baby say if she no ready to come, make she no stress my life. As I am laidis, I don leave her to be doing her own and make she leave me to be doing my own. Make one servant no hinder another servant na…”
Right now, I’m giggling at myself! But, in reality, I was frustrated while composing that note. As I mentioned in the note, three days ago I had a strange feeling that I couldn’t understand, all for the baby to come and pass her due date and still refuse to come. My husband, as usual, bore the brunt of my annoyance. Or who else do I direct my rage towards if not him? I decided not to speak to anyone that day. I can’t even put into words how I felt. In the midst of all those conflicting emotions, something occurred to me just before the end of the day, and it changed everything. “Why are you losing hope when it is almost over?” I heard within me. As if that wasn’t enough, I was asked, “Have you waited this long to give up now?” Right then, and there, I gave in to what the Lord had to do.
How many times have we succumbed to irritation and despondency simply because we are unable to see what God is doing? He is the one who is at work, and He will complete it. He just asks that we wait patiently for the manifestation of what He has perfected in us. True, the higher you go, the more difficult it becomes. However, the more difficult it becomes, the more patient we must be. My baby mysteriously appeared a few days later! Indeed, Oluwa lo fun mi bi (the Lord helped me to bring her forth – that is another testimony for another day).
Selah!
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